Monday, January 31, 2011

Be Present

I don't necessarily handle moving on from friendships well. I mean, it's easy to go about life as normal and be busy. It's easy to have a life apart from a person once they're gone, but the emotions and hurt feelings linger. Their absence leaves a hole that no one else can really fill. People are unique, and I don't think anyone is replaceable. Sure, new friends always come along, but it's not the same. That's not always bad, I guess. In my life I have most mourned the loss of probably two friendships. Our life paths diverged in more than just physical distance.

Now, another friendship as I have known it is over. I can see in a lot of ways where I have changed that causes my friend and me to not have much in common. Our attitudes, worldviews, and general perspective on life are completely different. I've realized that the foundation for a true friendship was never really built. It's a different kind of loss than a death or a breakup, but it's a loss none the less and one I will grieve.

I'm not sure the point of this post. Perhaps I'm just thinking about friendship. Perhaps I'm feeling the loss of many things in my life as so many things are changing. I think it's probably both. I still miss my friends. I wonder if in some way I will always miss them. Maybe I just need to focus more on the present and future and stop looking behind me so much. Yes, that's probably it. It's good to appreciate the people God has placed in our lives, but often times people are only there for a season. This is a very hard thing for me to accept, but unfortunately, it's life.

God is gently calling me to be present and live fully in the time and place he has put me. Breathe life in. Enjoy it. Feel, smell, taste, see, and hear it. Believe, trust, and hope. Love. See the opportunities all around to serve Him and show his love. Be present.

Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.- Psalm 34:8

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